Fifth Month Postpartum

You know that saying "I plead the fifth"? Well, this morning at 6:41, while I was begging God to please let Jilly go back to sleep, I was thinking about that and how emotional, stressed, and anxious I have been lately. I mean, things could be worse, but I sure have some big time emotions going on. For instance, when I watched the funeral of Det. Keith Dressel on t.v. the other day, I cried. It especially got to me to see the small hand of his 4 yr old boy clutching his Mommy's, knowing that he doesn't even realize now what he will realize in years to come. And, last night, Ryan wanted a book read to him. He held in his hand Oh my Gosh,Mrs. McNosh and Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs. He said that after we read Mrs. McNosh, he just wanted to look at the Meatball book by himself. For some reason, I just thought this was the cutest and most precious thing. And I started thinking to myself how these years are so golden, how in a few years he won't come to me and want to read a book, or sit and look at a picture book by himself. And then I scold myself for worrying about the house being clean, then feel guilty. Now I know how Kaylee becomes the emotional mess I mentioned. Bottom line, from now on, I am pleading the fifth, the fifth month postpartum!